Monday, April 28, 2014

4/28/2014: The Case of the Homesickness

Everything about life in Xinavane has just become normal. Running to Maputo for errands, random power and water outages, explaining chemistry in Portuguese...its all just normal life now, which is great. But it gives me more time for a realization of homesickness, most particularly today.
Just little things made homesickness rush over me. And for the most part I see homesickness as a good thing, it means I love my family and I want to share my experience with them, it means things here remind me of home as this place becomes more and more like home.
Today was typical Eastern Shore weather. Had to break out my fleece and a scarf to walk to school but still needed was perfect. But as I was walking to school a part of me just wanted to be walking from my Loblolly Lane casa to Henson Hall with my coffee cup for class, for a moment I closed my eyes and when I first opened them I was almost confused about why it didn't look like campus!
As if that wasn't crazy enough, watching The Fixer (known as Scandal in the states) brought tears to my eyes! Even St Elmo's Fire made me twinge. Images of Georgetown, the monuments, Pennsylvania Avenue...images of home...places I instantly wanted to see again! Don't worry, I promptly remembered that by this weekend I'll be at one of the most beautiful beaches ever and remembered those monuments and Pennsylvania Avenue will still exist, unless the world ends while I'm gone they're not going anywhere.
This evening (I'm telling you, its been random bouts of homesick all day!!) I was listening to Heart Like Mine and I was instantly transported back to the first time I listened to the song and I wanted to be there so bad; sitting in the back of my parents car next to my big brother curled up staring out my window as we cross my favorite Bay Bridge on our way to Fishermen's Crab Deck. Such a simple memory, just a regular activity that isn't a regular activity anymore and such a random song to spark that feeling. And then suddenly my heart traveled elsewhere. Sitting at the kitchen island writing a paper, my little brother energetically telling me all the details of his newest movie plan about penguins taking over Mozambique (this movie was planned shortly after I announced my news that I was moving here). I can just see his face and hear his voice and picture him dancing around the kitchen telling me everything on his mind at a hundred words a second. Oh I just want to hug my little guy, my selfless loving little brother who is to this day researching everything he can about Mozambique, Maputo, Xinavane, Africa and who just had to make a Katniss Care Package to go inside my care package so she wouldn't feel left out. What a kiddo.

Kind of a roller coaster of a day. But the benefit...only while being homesick in Africa can I be on my way to Crab Deck in Maryland AND simultaneously dancing in the kitchen in Chicago with my little brother. And somehow to me, these emotions just make me realize that this is becoming home to me, my life is becoming normal, I'm enjoying what I'm doing...and in no way can that be a bad thing!

So Maryland, California, Chicago, Family...just know you were all very much present in my day today, all of you showed up in my heart no matter what I did or where I went, and that's important.

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